Oh bla di...oh bla da

Mark's Memorial Party is on Saturday. His ashes were mailed (surprisingly) last week. My sister almost passed out when she realized what she was holding, he is now in the safety of her closet. We haven't decided yet if he will make an appearance at the party, we're not sure that we are ready for the ashes portion of the process. For now, he will reside in the closet. (And despite the fact that I don't believe in ghosts and that this is going to sound crazy but, I know he is wondering around the house...my dog has NEVER barked this much in the middle of the night before.)

Darcy is getting used to life as a solo dog...she's definitely lonely, but I'm trying to give her more attention than ever before. And she LOVES to go on walks these days, something she's never liked.

School is horrid. I'm already slacking. I'm just not interested in doing the work. I want to learn...but without all the tedious, busy work.

I'm attending a library conference this week, just two days. However, today was the first day and I had to leave early thanks to a migraine. Luckily, coming home and sleeping it off helped it go away. I'll still be able to write my professional e-Portfolio for school on this conference...

I'm still having panic attacks, but I'm medicated now. I hate taking medication (even for a headache), so this was a huge step for me. However, I feel better...not at all suicidal these days. It's weird how the panic can start...I couldn't sleep a few nights ago...up all night. It was awful. And the next night, I couldn't sleep again because I just worried that I wouldn't be able to sleep. Then that leads to the need for a Xanax. I hate it.

JD Salinger died...it's time to read Catcher in the Rye again...Holden always makes me feel better about my life.